Matching Game

Copyright 2011 by Gary Pullman

Your teacher has assigned you an essay in which you must make a claim that is based upon three related points. You start with your claim:

Mr. X is an ineffective instructor because __________________________________, __________________________________, and __________________________________.

Now, all you have to do is fill in the three blanks, giving reasons that support your claim. You think back over the course and come up with the following fillers for the blanks (the reasons that support your claim):

Mr. X is an ineffective instructor because he is impatient with students, he does not lecture on a level that is appropriate to his freshmen students, and he assigns class work and homework that do not relate to the course objectives.

That was easy, you think. This assignment should be done in no time at all!

You begin by brainstorming, and before you know it, you have drifted far from the first point in your thesis (Mr. X’s impatience with students). You let your hatred for the instructor lead you astray. Without being aware of doing so, you started thinking of how rude he is to students, how he tells lame jokes, and how he wastes class time telling personal stories about topics that do not have anything to do with the assignments or subject matter content on the syllabus. You also remember him being inconsiderate to a couple of students. As an example of an anecdote, he told a story about a fat man who tried one diet after another without success until he realized he had to change his hole lifestyle, get off the couch, and exercise as well as reduce his caloric intake--and there was a fat guy in class! Likewise, he made a point about avoiding sexist and racist language in essays--and there was a black chick in the class and half the students were women!

Before you know it, you have slipped away from your first point (Mr. X’ impatience with students) and started to write about his insensitivity, rudeness, and inconsideration toward students.

Let’s say you stayed on topic as you wrote about the second and third points in your thesis, Mr. X’s inappropriate level of communication during his lectures and his assignment of class work and homework that do not relate to the course objectives.

That means two thirds, or sixty-six percent, of your essay will actually remain on track, while a third of it will be sidetracked--if you don’t check the points in your thesis sentence against the points in your body paragraph’s topic sentences (and, equally importantly, the body paragraphs themselves).

Here’s a handy dandy way to do just this (before you hand in your paper) and save your grade.

Create a table that has three columns and four rows:

Label the top rows like this:

Now, as you check the points in your thesis against the points in your topic paragraphs (and the development of these points in the topic sentences’ respective body paragraphs), place “YES” in the “Match?” column if the points match or “NO” if they do not match.

Your matching game shows that the first point in your thesis sentence does NOT match the point in your first topic sentence or the way that the point in the topic sentence is developed in its body paragraph and that the second and third points in your thesis sentence DO match their counterparts in the second and third topic sentences and are developed correctly in these topic sentences’ respective body paragraphs. You have uncovered a very important error in your paper.

Fortunately, there is an easy way to correct the error and save your grade!

Simply change the second point in your thesis so that it matches the point that you actually make in your first topic sentence and support and develop in its body paragraph. Instead of turning in your paper with the original thesis sentence, turn in a revision with the corrected thesis sentence, which NOW reads:

Mr. X is an ineffective instructor because he is rude, inconsiderate, and insensitive toward his students; he does not lecture on a level that is appropriate to his freshmen students; and he assigns class work and homework that do not relate to the course objectives.

Notice we had to replace the commas between the items in the series with semicolons because the items in the first of the three phrases now contains commas, which the original phrase lacked: “he is rude, inconsiderate, and insensitive toward his students.”

Planning Your Essay

copyright 2008 by Gary L. Pullman

Audrey Hepburn as Eliza Doolittle in My Fair Lady

High school teachers and college instructors complain about students' essays being disorganized, unsupported, and undeveloped. In other words, they complain that students' writing is unfocused, vague, and general. If you use the principles we identified in "Essay Patterns of Development," your essay won't have these problems. However, it is often difficult for students to generate enough details to support and develop their thesis and topic sentences fully and completely. As a result, teachers and instructors conclude that the students' claims (thesis and topic sentences) are unconvincing or unsubstantiated. In this post, we will show how planning your essay can provide the specificity (the specific details) that are needed to make your claims convincing to your readers (in school, usually your teachers, instructors, and, sometimes, fellow students).

Let's assume that, using the "Three-Step Brainstorming Process" or the "Thesis Trident," you have generated this thesis concerning two movies, My Fair Lady and She's All That, that you watched in class:

In both movies, a bet results in the antagonists’ transformation, which, in turn, leads to the protagonists’ transformation.

This thesis, in turn, becomes the basis for developing these three topic sentences:

The main characters bet that they can transform the antagonists.
As a result of the bet, Eliza and Laney are transformed.
The antagonists’ transformations transform the protagonists.

Now, select examples from the movies that illustrate each of these topic sentences:

The main characters bet that they can transform the antagonists.

Professor Higgins bets Colonel Pickering that he (Professor Higgins) can pass Eliza Doolittle off as a “duchess at the embassy ball.”

Professor Higgins teaches Eliza to speak properly.

He uses rote learning (memorization) techniques to teach her to pronounce words
correctly.
He insists that she practices pronunciation drills.
He assigns her appropriate conversation topics.

Professor Higgins teaches Eliza to act like a lady.

He directs his housekeeper to bathe Eliza.
Professor Higgins and Colonel Pickering pick out dresses for Eliza to wear.
Professor Higgins teaches Eliza to behave properly.

He rehearses Eliza at the Ascot racetrack.

Eliza is in mixed company, among high society folk.
Eliza fails the test.

Professor Higgins faces a penalty if he loses the bet.

He would have to pay his own expenses.
He would have to set Eliza up as a flower shop owner.

Zach Siler bets Dean Sampson that he (Zach) can make Laney Boggs their high school’s annual prom queen.

Zach helps Lanie to socialize.
To help her to become more popular, Zach introduces Lanie to his friends.

Zach faces a penalty if he loses the bet: he must appear naked at his high school graduation ceremony.

As a result of the bet, Eliza and Laney are transformed.

Eliza develops self-esteem and self-confidence, and she becomes more assertive.

When Freddie Eynsford-Hill and the prince at the embassy ball are attracted to her, Eliza understands that men can find her attractive, which increases her self-esteem.
When Colonel Pickering treats Eliza courteously, she understands that she is worthy of being treated with respect, which also enhances her self-esteem.
When Eliza passes herself off as a princess at the embassy ball, she gains self-confidence.
When Eliza realizes that she can act independently of Professor Higgins, she becomes more assertive.

Lanie becomes more outgoing and more popular, gaining self-esteem and assertiveness.

Zach accompanies Lanie to the theater and takes her to the beach, where she must
interact with her peers.
Zach introduces Lanie to his friends, who are members of the in-crowd.
Although Lanie does not win the title of prom queen, she is a close runner-up, which suggests that she has gained a good deal of popularity.
Lanie gains enough assertiveness to stand up for her values, even if they make her less popular.

The antagonists’ transformations transform the protagonists.

Professor Higgins comes to think of Eliza as a person.
After Eliza stands up to him, showing him that she is an independent individual deserving of respect, Professor Higgins is attracted to Eliza.He begins to treat her with respect.
He wants to become friends with her because of who she is rather than because of what he may gain from his association with her.

Zach falls in love with Lanie.

After Lanie insists upon living according to her own values, Zach respects her
as a person.
He wants to become friends with her because of who she is rather than because of what he may gain from his association with her.

By planning your essay ahead of time, thinking of the various examples from the movies themselves that you can use to support and develop each of your essay's topic sentences, you have generated a lot of specific material that will make your claims (thesis and topic sentences) convincing to your readers. In fact, the essay has almost written itself. Basically, all you have left to do is to write an introductory paragraph and a concluding paragraph, add transitions, and add any additional examples that come to mind as you write the first draft of your essay. The result might be something like this (the thesis is in bold font; the topic sentences are underlined):

A Lady Is As A Lady Does

by Gary L. Pullman

What is a lady? In part, the answer to this question depends upon the society in which a woman lives, for this term is defined by others--the members of the upper class--who determine what it shall mean. The definition of the term "lady" is likely to change with the times, and it is also likely to differ from one place to another. In nineteenth-century London's high society, being a lady meant something far different than being a lady meant among the in-crowd of a twentieth-century American high school. In both cases, those who had the power to define the social significance of other people's status, or standing, in society defined which women could be considered ladies and which could not be considered to be such. Often, such distinctions are based upon arbitrary, superficial standards. In the movie My Fair Lady, it is mostly how a woman appears and acts that determines whether she shall be considered a lady, whereas, in She's All That, it is largely a matter of whether a girl is popular among her peers that determines whether she shall be considered a lady. The absurdity and superficiality of these social class distinctions is made clear by the idea that a woman can change stations as a result of subterfuge and artifice. In both movies, a bet results in the antagonists’ transformation, which, in turn, leads to the protagonists’ transformation.

The main characters bet that they can transform the antagonists. Professor Higgins bets Colonel Pickering that he (Professor Higgins) can pass Eliza Doolittle off as a “duchess at the embassy ball.” Professor Higgins teaches Eliza to speak properly. He uses rote learning (memorization) techniques to teach her to pronounce words correctly. He insists that she practices pronunciation drills. He assigns her appropriate conversation topics, advising her to speak only about "the weather and everyone's health." Professor Higgins teaches Eliza to act like a lady. He directs his housekeeper to bathe Eliza. Professor Higgins and Colonel Pickering pick out dresses for Eliza to wear. Professor Higgins teaches Eliza to behave properly, teaching her the difference between a handkerchief and her sleeve. He rehearses Eliza at the Ascot racetrack. Eliza is in mixed company, among high society folk.Eliza fails the test. Professor Higgins faces a penalty if he loses the bet. He would have to pay his own expenses.He would have to set Eliza up as a flower shop owner. Zach Siler bets Dean Sampson that he (Zach) can make Laney Boggs their high school’s annual prom queen. Zach helps Lanie to socialize. To help her to become more popular, Zach introduces Lanie to his friends. Zach faces a penalty if he loses the bet: he must appear naked at his high school graduation ceremony.

As a result of the bet, Eliza and Laney are transformed. Eliza develops self-esteem and self-confidence, and she becomes more assertive. When Freddie Eynsford-Hill and the prince at the embassy ball are attracted to her, Eliza understands that men can find her attractive, which increases her self-esteem. When Colonel Pickering treats Eliza courteously, she understands that she is worthy of being treated with respect, which also enhances her self-esteem. When Eliza passes herself off as a princess at the embassy ball, she gains self-confidence. When Eliza realizes that she can act independently of Professor Higgins, she becomes more assertive. Lanie becomes more outgoing and more popular, gaining self-esteem and assertiveness. Zach accompanies Lanie to the theater and takes her to the beach, where she must interact with her peers. Zach introduces Lanie to his friends, who are members of the in-crowd. Although Lanie does not win the title of prom queen, she is a close runner-up, which suggests that she has gained a good deal of popularity. Lanie gains enough assertiveness to stand up for her values, even if they make her less popular.

The antagonists’ transformations transform the protagonists. Professor Higgins comes to think of Eliza as a person. After Eliza stands up to him, showing him that she is an independent individual deserving of respect, Professor Higgins is attracted to Eliza. He begins to treat her with respect. He wants to become friends with her because of who she is rather than because of what he may gain from his association with her. Zach falls in love with Lanie. After Lanie insists upon living according to her own values, Zach respects her as a person. He wants to become friends with her because of who she is rather than because of what he may gain from his association with her.

Both My Fair Lady and She's All That show that the powerful, whether they are the members of society's upper class or the most popular crowd in a high school, determine the social status of others, including women. Whether a woman is to be considered a lady and is to be treated accordingly depends not so much upon who she is herself as it does upon what others--the social elite--think of her. These movies suggest that social class distinctions are often based upon superficial, or even absurd, standards, such as one's appearance, manner of speech, and popularity. Nevertheless, these distinctions have real effects both upon how women are treated by others and upon how they think and feel about themselves. These movies also show the power of love to transform others, for it is when Professor Higgins truly becomes friends with Eliza and when Zach falls in love with Lanie that their feelings for the women they’ve transformed into ladies allow the ladies to transform them into men who care about them as people rather than as creations whose transformations reflect nothing more than their winning of a cruel bet. Love, not appearance, dress, manner, and popularity, these movies suggest, is the basis for real relationships and significant transformation.

Rachel Leigh Cook as Lanie Boggs in She's All That

Argumentation Development Template

copyright 2008 by Gary L. Pullman

Note: We recommend that you read our "Essay Patterns of Development" post before you read this post.

Argumentation: Use reasons and appeals to emotion to convince your audience to accept your point of view or to perform an action that you recommend.

Note: Persuasion is similar to argumentation, except that argumentation’s primary technique is to advance reasons as to why the reader should agree with a point of view or take a particular action, supporting these reasons with optional, appropriate, but supplemental, appeals to emotion.

Topic: Persevere in the pursuit of your college degree

THESIS: By persevering in the pursuit of a college degree, a student will prepare for career success by acquiring needed knowledge, skills, and practice; will earn more money than a high school graduate earns; and will feel more confident about him- or herself after graduation.

Use this blank template to generate a thesis for your own argumentative essay:

THESIS:

Essay Patterns of Development

copyright 2008 by Gary L. Pullman

A generic table (Generic Table for Generating a Thesis Sentence) helps students to understand that the thesis sentence for a typical high school or freshman college essay contains a plan of development that breaks the essay’s topic into three related points; these points are the bases, in turn, of the topic sentences for the essay’s three body paragraphs.

However, more specific tables help students to customize this concept, adapting it to particular patterns of development.

Essays are composed according to a number of patterns of development:

• Analysis
• Argumentation
• Causal analysis (cause-effect)
• Classification (usually used with division)
• Comparison (usually used with contrast)
• Contrast (usually used with comparison)
• Definition
• Description
• Division (usually used with classification)
• Evaluation
• Exemplification, or illustration
• Narration
• Persuasion
• Process analysis (“how to”)

Note: Rhetoric and composition courses usually break these patterns of development into the following groups:

• Definition
• Description
• Exposition
• Causal analysis (cause-effect)
• Classification-division
• Comparison-contrast
• Evaluation
• Process analysis (“how to”)
• Narration
• Persuasion and argumentation

Charts, or tables, each consisting of one or more rows and several columns, provide a visual means of organizing material for essays that employ each of these patterns of development.

Each of these essay templates can be used to generate a thesis sentence that includes a plan of development containing three related points. The beginning of the thesis sentence will be the template’s topic (sometimes, slightly reworded), identified in the template’s left column, and the plan of development will be the three points listed in the template’s other three columns. For example, from the following template, this thesis sentence may be derived:

THESIS: Vampires and zombies are revenants who feed on human beings and are driven by simple motives.

Likewise, from the following table, this thesis may be developed:

THESIS: The legends concerning vampires and zombies differ, as do the religions with which they associated and the difficulty with which they are destroyed.

These tables are effective templates, but they have several limitations that the instructor must keep in mind. In some cases, their use implies an understanding of certain terms (e. g., metaphor, simile, personification, image, juxtaposition) that students may not have. In such cases, the instructor will need to define and exemplify the meanings of such terms before the students use the template. In other instances, as when a cause-effect, a comparison-contrast, or a classification-division essay (rather than simply a cause or an effect essay, a comparison or a contrast essay, or a classification or a division essay) is required, one template must be used with another, and some revision as to the employment of the templates may be in order.

For example, suppose a student were required to write a comparison-contrast essay. First, he or she should use the Comparison Essay template to identify the points of similarity between the two persons, places, or things that are to be compared. Then, he or she should use the Contrast Essay template to identify the points of difference between the two persons, places, or things that are to be contrasted. Then, the comparisons and contrasts should be linked in a single thesis sentence. Here is an example:

THESIS: Although vampires and zombies are both revenants who feed on human beings and are driven by simple motives, the legends concerning these monsters differ, as do the religions with which they associated and the difficulty with which they are destroyed.

Another note of caution is in order concerning the use of these tables. Most essays require a thesis that states not only facts but an interpretation of the facts (an opinion concerning them). These templates do not necessarily yield such a thesis. However, an opinion can be added, as is done in the case of the following thesis:

THESIS: Vampires are more complex villains than zombies because, although both monsters are revenants who feed on human beings and are driven by simple motives, the legends concerning vampires are more elaborate than those concerning zombies, as is the religion with which vampires are associated and the difficulty with which vampires are destroyed.

Generic Table for Generating a Thesis Sentence

This generic table helps students to understand that the thesis sentence for a typical high school or freshman college essay contains a plan of development that breaks the essay’s topic into three related points; these points are the bases, in turn, of the topic sentences for the essay’s three body paragraphs.

Once the student has understood this procedure and has practiced it several times using the generic table, he or she should be introduced, as the writing situation warrants each introduction, to the more specific tables that will help him or her to develop material (and theses) that relate to the specific pattern or patterns of development that are best suited to the writing assignment or the writer‘s purpose, whether this assignment or purpose is analysis, argumentation, causal analysis (cause-effect), classification (usually used with division), comparison (usually used with contrast), contrast (usually used with comparison), definition, description, division (usually used with classification), exemplification (illustration), persuasion, or process analysis (“how to”).

To use the generic table, replace “Essay’s Topic” (top rectangle) with the actual topic of the essay that is being written. Then, divide the topic into three related points, listing each point in its own square, in the order in which they will be presented in the essay. By reading down and to the right, in a counterclockwise direction, and adding an appropriate verb and linking words, as necessary, the student can easily develop a thesis sentence that includes a plan of development that contains three related points.

Here is an example:

By adding the verb “can occur,” the preposition “in,” the conjunction “or,” and the phrase “public and private areas of one’s life,” the student will have constructed a thesis sentence that includes a plan of development that contains three related points:

THESIS: Rude behavior can occur in public, in private, or in both public and private areas of one’s life.

Refer to the specific templates that appear in subsequent posts apply this generic technique to particular essay patterns of development written for the student.

Note: Each specific template (table) includes a completed table as a sample and a blank table that can be reproduced for the student’s use.

The Five-Paragraph Essay

copyright 2008 by Gary L. Pullman

Many high schools and colleges teach students to write a five-paragraph essay in which:

1. an introductory paragraph (a) captures the reader's interest, (b) introduces the essay's topic, and (c) ends with a thesis sentence that contains a three-point plan of development;
2. body paragraph 1 (a) starts with a topic sentence based upon the first point in the thesis and (b) uses specific details to support and develop the topic sentence;
3. body paragraph 2 (a) starts with a topic sentence based upon the second point in the thesis and (b) uses specific details to support and develop the topic sentence;
4. body paragraph 3 (a) starts with a topic sentence based upon the third point in the thesis and (b) uses specific details to support and develop the topic sentence;
5. and ends with a concluding paragraph that (a) restates the thesis sentence in words other than those in which the thesis was stated originally (in the introductory paragraph) and (b) provides an appropriate closure to the essay.

Essays Made Easy uses this three-point thesis, five-paragraph essay format, because it helps to organize the writer's thoughts and provides a clear-cut, effective way of supporting and developing the writer's ideas.

In our next post, we will consider a sample essay that follows this format.